Kindness towards wives in light of Islam
The holy prophet (May Allah’s mercy be with him) said the best man among all is the one who is kind to his wife. It was added that man’s behavior towards his wife reflects his inner self and true character. One of the companions asked the most beloved prophet of Allah that how can a Muslim husband show his kindness towards wife to which Hazra Muhammad (PBUH) replied that he must smile whenever he sees her and must not hurt her physically or emotionally. He also added that:
- She should be treated gently and must be loved.
- She should be dealt with patience and care.
- She must be given the satisfaction of security and safety.
- She must be listened with attention.
It is stated in Quran that husbands must encourage the positive traits of their wives and give them the motivation to better themselves. It is added most sincere and deep consideration comes from bottom of heart and that is what matters the most to wives. A husband must complement her everyday and praise all the good things about her. This way she feels loved and satisfied. God instructs men to be nice to their wives and to treat them well to the best of their ability:
“And live with them in kindness” (Quran 4:19)
Perfect marriage requires sharing everything so a husband must be willing to open up about his secrets and past (if there is any) with his wife. He should care about his problems and try his best to fix them. It is the responsibility of husband to understand her deep rooted worries and assure that he will stay by his side and together they will figure everything out. Once asked by one of his companions about the rights of wives over their husbands, he said:
“That you should give her food when you eat, clothe her when you clothe yourself, do not strike her on the face, do not revile her or separate yourself from her except in the house.”
Conflicts and fight are unavoidable and it often leads to hot arguments and burning statements. If a problem occurs at some point of marriage and couple get into serious fight a husband still should not hurt her wife physically or emotionally. He should not lose his temper to an extent where he gets out of control and lose respect in eyes of his wife forever. Under no circumstance, even when he is angry or somehow feels justified, is a husband allowed to malign her by using hurtful words or cause her any injury.